“In the late middle ages, the Catholic Church thought up a Diabolical way to bring in more Cash. They sent out Professional Pardoners to visit the Sinful, that is Everybody, and tell them that for a bit of Cash, their sins would be forgiven. Fork over the cash and no Penance, and no time in Purgatory. They called these ‘get out of Hell Free’ cards ‘Indulgences.’ And they Sure weren’t Free. The bigger the sin, the pricier the Indulgence. So suffer eternal Agony, Cut back on the fun of Sinning,… or pay the Fun tax. These “Sin Credits” were a big Money Maker until Martin Luther came along, and Cried… ‘Bullshit!’”—Penn Jillette (Bullshit: Episode 6, Season 6) What does this have to do with carbon Credits? If I have to explain the correlation… Oh, Christ.
Go Online, and search “Carbon Credits.” Go Ahead, I’ll wait. Google brings up thousands of Companies that offer the opportunity to buy Carbon Credits. Claiming they will Invest the money you give them in Renewable energy, or environmental projects (like planting trees, etc.). Ok, fine… but be aware that there are no Scientific Standards for determining the cost of your “Credit.” Carbon Credit companies make their own formula, and charge whatever they want. And there are no ‘watchdogs’ to make sure they actually invest that money properly. So basically you give them money, and they can do whatever the fuck they want with it. There is nothing to stop them from pissing your money away on whatever frivolous junk they want. The most Famous of these websites is Run by Al Gore. Yes, you can’t talk Carbon Credits, or the Environment, without mentioning Al Gore. It’s an EPA thing. Not “Environmental Protection Agency.” “Egregiously Pushy Asshole!!” An investigation done in 2006, by the Tennessee Center for Policy Research, revealed that Al Gore uses 20 times more energy than the average person. That’s right. The greatest American Eco-Hero, is an Energy Hog. His 20 room mansion used over 191,000 Kilowatts, as opposed to the average home that uses around 11,000 kilowatts. Every Month, Al Gore uses more energy, than any of us will in 17 months! So, Al isn’t as worried as he says we all should be. When this research was uncovered in 2007, Gore’s people didn’t deny it. Instead they said he was in the process of installing solar panels, and had swapped some of his incandescent light bulbs with fluorescent ones. What a Martyr! To offset the Damage he admits he’s causing to the environment, he buys Carbon Credits… from himself! Al Gore owns the website, and the company that operates it (Generation Investment Management), and makes money when you buy carbon credits through his Company. Gore started that private company in 2004, 2 years before his Oscar Winning movie was released. Kind of an “Inconvenient Truth” eh? So, what was the reaction to the TCPR digging up this information? Well, TCPR received thousands of angry letters, and Dozens of Death threats. To these people Al Gore is a prophet, and by exposing this information by completely Legal and legitimate means, they attacked their prophet. Al has convinced hundreds of thousands of people to buy Carbon Credits from his website, and is making a fortune off your guilt. Ever wonder why he is pushing all this “go Green” crap?! When you feel guilty about your carbon footprint, Al Gore makes a lot of “Green.” With all of Al Gore’s “Followers,” you’d think he’d actually done something, other than a Power-point Slideshow exaggerating the dangers of global warming. Well he did win an Oscar, that’s a “Science” Prize right? And he won the Nobel Prize for peace. Because prophesying Doom is… Peaceful? John Coleman, you may remember him from Part 1 (the guy who announced that “Global Warming is a Scam”), has challenged Al Gore to Dozens of Debates on the issue, but Al will have no part of it. According to Al’s Deputy Press Secretary… “Mr. Gore doesn’t debate Global Warming.” That’s a direct quote!! Hmm, odd. Is his position so weak and flimsy that it can’t stand up to a simple debate, or exchange of ideas? Sounds kind of like religion, doesn’t it. They don’t debate God, either. Wow, the similarities to Religion are uncanny.
A man by the name of Roger Revelle, you have probably never heard of him, is the Grandfather of the Global warming myth. He also happens to be the personal mentor of Al Gore. Well, he was. In the 1960’s Revelle was working as a professor at Harvard University where he would eventually meet his young pupil, Al Gore. He would Involve Gore, and some of his classmates, in the tabulating of data from a carbon dioxide study. Gore was so impressed by this, he included it in his 1992 book “The Earth and the Balance” which would later become “An Inconvenient Truth.” There is no doubt that Roger Revelle had a huge impact on Gore. But there is a twist! In 1988, Revelle was having second thoughts about whether or not Carbon Dioxide was a significant greenhouse gas. In 1991 he co-authored a report for the new science magazine Cosmos in which he expressed his strong doubts about global warming, and urged more research before any remedial action was taken. At that point Mr. Gore announced that Revelle was senile and refused to debate global warming. A refusal he holds onto today. Later in 1991 Roger Revelle gave what was to be his last speech at very private, very powerful, summer enclave of powerful men and politicians at the Bohemian Grove in Northern California. There, he apologized for his research and for sending so many people in the wrong direction on global warming. Revelle had realized that it was a false alarm, and that the science was flawed before he died. He passed away of a heart attack in late 1991. so, Al didn’t do his homework; he just took what his professor said and ran with it. He may honestly believe in global warming, or he may be totally full of shit (I’m leaning towards “Full of Shit” myself), but regardless of that, it’s still just one man’s opinion, whether he really believes it or not. “Every bit of my Bullshit Detector goes off like crazy over Global Warming, and every fuckin thing Al Gore says. He seems to me like a lying sack of shit who’s wrong about everything. He seems that way to me, but my feeling on that is a ‘feeling’ and if there’s one thing we all believe (referring to skeptics) it’s that that’s not enough.”—Penn Jillette at TAM 6 in Las Vegas, NV.
For some of the poorest people on the planet, our being green can affect their survival. How? Al Gore, and his green Followers, are trying to pass new regulations and Carbon Taxes that will end up raising the global price of fuel. Fuel people in 3rd world countries need to cook, or pump water. Fuel to get their crops to market, their Kids to school or to a doctor. “When you talk about raising the price of energy to them, you’re going to kill people. Just like the environmentally induced ban on DDT years ago has resulted in tens of millions of deaths.”-- John Charles. But still, all you have to do is just mention Al Gore’s Name, and people will say, and do, just about anything.
John Charles is the President of Cascade Policy Institute, a free-market Think-Tank, in Portland, Oregon. “I don’t see the reason to Demonize Carbon. It’s an essential element In the Earth’s climate control system, and if we didn’t have it, it would be too cold for humanity to be here.” Yes, without Carbon Dioxide, our little Blue-Green Planet would be a little White Ice Ball. “97% of CO2 emitted every year, around the world, is naturally caused, only about 3% are caused by Humans.” All 7 BILLION of us! (Didn’t I mention this before? Oh yeah, I Did. But I felt the need to mention it again!) So if he’s right, and he’s not my only source, India, China, US Factories, Cars, Coal energy Plants, and Hummers (Not those Hummers), are generating only 3% of the Earths CO2. The biggest sources are Decaying Plants, Volcanoes, and Forest Fires. John was the executive Director of the Oregon Environmental Council for 17 years. So maybe he does know what he’s talking about. “If it’s an average citizen, some Mom or Dad, who wants to tell their child that they’re carbon neutral, it’s sort of about feeling good about themselves… to me it’s kind of like buying and selling Pet Rocks.”
This whole issue comes down to “do you know?” And the answer has to be “No.” We have evidence that the planet is getting warmer. We also have evidence that it was a frozen ball of ice 15 miles thick at least once in its past. There is evidence of periods of high heat, and full planet Jungles (oh, about 70 million years ago), and Ice ages as recent as 25,000 years ago. The planet heats and Cools no matter what we do. This ball of rock has been around for a little over 4.5 Billion years. And has been capable of supporting life for a little over 2.5 Billion. We’ve been burning fossil fuels for a little over 200 years. 200 years versus four and a half Billion!! I have a feeling the Planet will be just fine. In fact, it will likely be here LONG after we’re gone.
I know what some of you are saying, “Why doesn’t he just grow a dick, and say that “Global warming is all Bullshit’. “ I’d love to, but… I have a confession to make. I don’t know! Sorry, I worked on it, I just don’t know. I know that Feng Shui is Bullshit, and the Bible is total Bullshit, but Global Warming… I just don’t know. There is good evidence on both sides, but we haven’t been looking into it long enough to really get any definable data. There is evidence the planet is getting warmer, but we can’t be sure we’re causing it. And if we did cause, we don’t know if we can fix it. And if we can fix it… we don’t know how. We just don’t Fucking Know! But Cutting back our quality of life is not the right way to fix things. Shit…. I’m not even sure of that. One thing I do know, 100%, is that it won’t do us any good to buy forgiveness from an asshole who is making a fortune off your guilt. You good people who really want to help, if you really feel you need forgiveness for how good your life is, well… you’ve done your penance. You want to help, and that’s good enough for me. By my power, which is exactly the same as the Pope’s, and Al Gore’s, you are now all forgiven!
Credits/Sources: Penn & Teller: Bullshit!. The Tennessee Center for Policy Research, The James Randi Educational Foundation, JunkScience.com, Generation Investment Management (not in a good way), John Coleman http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-WmxFkPloaY&feature=youtube_gdata_player(the founder of the weather channel, and the weather man from good morning America in the 70’s), the Weather network, Environment Canada website, Bjorn Lumborg: The Skeptical Environmentalist, Jerry Taylor: Director of Natural Resource Studies at the CATO institute, http://uscentrist.org/about/issues/environment/john_coleman, Cascade Policy Institute, http://www.lomborg.com/.
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